Waluigi's Very Slow Quest to the Nearest Burger King
by gamerboyinar
Summary: Waluigi is hungry and wants Burger King


One lazy Wednesday afternoon , Waluigi was getting hungry, but not just for anything, but for a Whopper from Burger King, with its sesame seed buns, perfectly grilled meat patty, crispy lettuce and tomatoes, and the perfectly melted cheese. His nose could smell it, even though the nearest Burger King to him was near the tennis courts in Racquetia, about two hours away with a car. Unluckily for Waluigi, he got his driver's license taken away from him yesterday, so his only other option of travel that will not tire his feet, was his turtle. So he packed up all of his necessities: his tennis racquet, his money, his water, his specially-made binoculars, and more pairs of his favorite overalls. Waluigi then drew up his map to the Burger King and looked online for the ratings of this place, which were fairly high. Next, he had to pack everything into the turtle's shell, which is another dimension with nothing but forgotten bags and pickles. The turtle's name is Cucumber, but Waluigi did not pick it out, Cucumber did. So, after Waluigi gave Cucumber his favorite type of bath, being drenched in vinegar, they left to get to Racquetia. Their first expected destination was at the location of his old taco stand in the east side of Seaside Hill. Although this was their plan, they very soon found masterchef Gordon Ramsay looking for his beloved lamb sauce. Waluigi first asked him, "Did you check everywhere in your house?" When he said yes, Waluigi replied with "Too Bad, Waluigi Time!" Then, out of nowhere, Cucumber pulls the lamb sauce out of his shell. Gordon then thanked them by giving them some sausage he had just cooked up. After that experience, the pair was looking upon the taco shop, just when he saw that his intern, Shadow the Hedgehog, was running his taco stand. Upon further investigation at his shop, he could tell that Shadow hadn't cleaned it in weeks. Shadow's explanation was "I'm too edgy to work." Then he tried one of his tacos, and they were as bad as a plain hard shell tortilla with a single pickle in it, as that is what it was. Cucumber, swimming at the Seaside Shore, then found a piece of paper with instructions on it. It read, _1\. Take the nearest taco shell and place it on the counter. 2. Place the cardboard ingredients inside the taco shell. 3. Sell the "taco" for a very high price._ Cucumber, being the smart one out of the three at the area, walked into the taco shop and did as loud of a turtle noise as he could to grab Waluigi and Shadow's attention. Cucumber then passed the paper to Waluigi, who read through it to approve it, then passed it to Shadow. The taco shop would have a booming crowd around it every day after, but Waluigi still hasn't gotten his Whopper. Their next destination was the Bone-Dry Desert racing track. On their way to this heated place, they encountered a band of sand pirates. They told them something about how they wanted to be somewhere without sand, and being Waluigi, he said, "There's a place filled with grass right outside this desert. Why did you guys even come here." The sand pirates did not know how to respond to that brilliant quote, so they just left. Finally reaching the race track, Waluigi saw one of his many rivals, Pink-Gold Peach. She challenged him to a race, but not there, but at Wario Stadium in the city. Waluigi accepted, but he said he would have to get his motorbike built. He left the track without getting his important item, which was the legendary sand pickle for Cucumber to

eat. It was supposed to make the trip much faster, but because of Pink-Gold's intervention, they forgot it. Surprisingly, on their way to the city, there were no exciting things, except for a Cheeto-breathing gecko. When Cucumber and Waluigi arrived at the stadium, to their surprise, they saw that Waluigi's bike was ready. On the bike, there was a note that read, "Weh-heh-heh! Nice to see you racing on my track, Waluigi. Hope you win! -Wario" Pink-Gold was already lined up at the track, along with ten other racers. When Waluigi lined up on his bike, the other racers grinned as they were all going to win, but what they did not know was that Waluigi didn't only practice his racing at Waluigi Pinball, but he also practiced at Wario Stadium. This meant that he knew all of the shortcuts, but before he could boast in his mind even more, he could hear the announcer countdown how long it was before they could go. "Three, two, one… GO!" They were all off to the race with hundreds of people watching them. Waluigi easily got ahead of the first ten racers, and barely got past Pink-Gold Peach, but she stayed on his tail for the entire race, and was fiercely boosting all she could, but she could not beat the starving hero, Waluigi. He then got to keep the bike, but still wasn't allowed to ride it, as he could not drive without his license. After they escaped from the city, they had to go to Pink-Sand Island to get Cucumber some shell armor. On their way there, they came across a very big dilema. Pink-Gold Peach stole Waluigi's money! They couldn't imagine why she would, as she got herself covered entirely in rose-gold, by paying a couple thousand dollars. So the crew went back to the city and stole it back, plus a couple hundred more dollars. After that, Waluigi was able to ship his bike to his house, and then continue to get the shell armor, then they saw this girl named either Zelda or Link, but they did not know which, but she was dressed in adventuring clothes as if she was an adventurer, but her style looked very elegant, but soon after they saw this man dressed in a blue shirt, but the name confusion was the exact same as the girl. As they got to the ocean needed to swim to the shore of Pink-Sand Island, they saw this weird middle-aged man floating above the ocean saying lines like, "I'm a fairy." Another thing he said was, "Tingle, Tingle, Kooloo-Limpah!" Although Waluigi was thinking about not going, he had to get the armor to handle the castle guards. When they got there, the sign actually read, "Link-Sand Island," and it looked like a large forest, although the shore actually did have pink sand. Luckily in they got to the middle of the island, where the sell armor was and took it without a challenge. That's when skeletons came out of the ground, but they just danced. They even showed them a shortcut out of the used to be forest. On the way back to the mainland, they saw the island sinking behind them, so the armor must have had been stopping some type of mechanism in the island. They had been travelling for what had seem like weeks, yet they hadn't even seen the gates to Racquetia yet. They had two more destinations on their list, and one required them to go off the they got to the edge, they saw Toad's lifeless face, and only his face. The grass was his face. The Mountains were his face. The only reason this was off the map was because the area of the map was just Toad's face. The only sign there read, "Toad's Domain," and it was even hard to read it as the background of the sign was Toad. They then saw Toad and asked, "How did you do this? I looked at the map a year ago and this area was not on it." Toad then answered with, "Bup." That angered Cucumber, so he bit Toad and he screamed, but it just sounded like every other sound in the area, as it was just Toad yelling and screaming. What they were retrieving in the area was Toad's cooperation, as Waluigi knew that he was going to have to play tennis to get to Burger King, and he now had money to buy him a Whopper. So Waluigi said sorry to Toad about Cucumber's behavior and told him that if he helped him beat a team in tennis, he would buy him something from Burger King. After a bup of agreement, the trio were on their way to Racquetia. On the way back, a whole village of Toads told them to stay there for a night. Waluigi accepted the offer. They had Toad chicken with a side of Toad salad for dinner. Then they slept on the Toad floor. When they woke up, they headed out immediately for Burger King. When they were closing in on Racquetia, the trio found out that there was a gate and, "The only entrance," Toad said, "is on the other side." They then walked over and opened the gate where, unsurprisingly, there were tennis courts all around, so Waluigi took out his racquet and Toad found his in Cucumber's shell, and they played at least 4 tennis matches. When they were almost at the Burger King, Waluigi and Toad were challenged by Luigi and Pink-Gold Peach. The new duo was mad at them because Luigi's money had suddenly disappeared, and the same had happened to Pink-Gold, but she also lost her race by a few hundred milliseconds. Their only solution was to team up and beat Waluigi at his own game. They said the rules were first to gain a set wins the match, and the set was decided by who gets to three games first. They also said that power shots were legal in their game. So when they started this tense match, Waluigi was first up to serve, and after Luigi had hit the ball back, Toad hit the ball extremely hard and it went so fast that neither Luigi or Pink-Gold Peach could hit it. Then almost all of their power shots were fully charged in their racquets and Pink-Gold immediately used hers. It turned the ball into a rose-gold ball and made the person who hit it be stuck for a second. Toad then hit it with his and it made it carry spores and made Luigi fall asleep. With the first two games done, and match point for team Tall & Short, Waluigi used his tornado power shot and won some Burger King. He walked in and ordered the Whopper and some chicken nuggets for Toad and ate them.


End file.
